V. IMPORTANT: DID I MENTION THE FREE WINE?

Jimmy Bastard · **Posted:** Sat Sep 20, 2008 11:44 am

Holy shit.
Felix Dennis is touring again.
Reserve your free tickets right fucking NOW!
http://didimentionthefreewine.com/?page_id=6
Edinburgh, 9 October, Jongleurs

If you are unaware as to who the hell he is - know this
- he's rich
- he writes and performs poetry
- to secure an audience
/ tickets are free (first come first serve)
/ he places on free wine and canapés
also know
- the poetry is not totally shit, he's a man that knows a thing or two about a thing or two and carries charisma
- the wine - it's the expensive kind - never under fifty notes a bottle bought up wholesale - he has his people stock the venues weeks in advance so the wine can rest up correctly and the canapés - they are fussy and posh n'all.
- you may be thinking you will be restricted to a single glass - no such scam - on his lat tour I reckon I saw off three bottles and pulled off the most expensive spill of a fine career - bundling a trestle table with thirty or so full glasses.
BOOK NOW!
More info about Felix Dennis
he made his name putting out OZ magazine in the sixties, traded ideals for mischief, made silly money with a series of martial arts magazines in the seventies cashing in on the kung fu craze and then got hold of a couple of men's magazines at their peak and ditched them ahead of the decline.
He's a smart bastard.
I think I'm gonna follow him for the full tour.

milk · **Posted:** Sat Sep 20, 2008 4:36 pm

awesome, cheers for the tip.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Felix_Dennis

"Dennis is credited with having been the first person to say the word cunt on British television, on a live 1970 edition of David Frost's The Frost Programme."

"Dennis is also very involved in planting trees and sustainable forestry. One of his continuing projects is the Forest of Dennis, which is supposed to become the largest forest in England."

sounds well rounded.

martinmckenna · **Posted:** Sat Sep 20, 2008 5:34 pm

am in , thanks dia

michaelbowdidge · **Posted:** Sat Sep 20, 2008 5:39 pm

Likewise, nice one Dai!

simone · **Joined:** Wed Mar 19, 2008 11:47 am **Posts:** 579

free wine...i mean poetry, hooray
me too me too
baaa
good job it wasn't in september heh dai!

Jimmy Bastard · **Posted:** Thu Sep 25, 2008 4:57 pm

Also October the 9th iis the day of atonement, so I guess I'll be atoning in my own way.

Jimmy Bastard · **Posted:** Thu Oct 02, 2008 4:17 pm

First-off a mini-interview in today's G2 Guardian
http://www.guardian.co.uk/books/2008/oc ... publishing

And secondly, a rather sweet, unexpected PM
(note I received confirmation for tickets today, anyone who hasn't and wishes to come along, let me know)

Hi Jimmy,

Thanks for linking through to didimentionthefreewine.com We forwarded your comment on to Felix who found it very amusing.

Just wanted to check that you registered for tickets for Edinburgh. If so, you should have received an email today with a link to your tickets to download. If you didn't get a ticket (or two) email me directly katherine_riggs@dennis.co.uk and I'll add you to the list.

Hope you don't mind, but you're now known affectionately as "Jimmy The Bastard" at Felix HQ.

Thanks again! And hope you enjoy the show!

Katherine Riggs

chris · **Posted:** Thu Oct 02, 2008 4:22 pm

yes please, my request for tickets was rejected! have they no taste!

outraged!

martinmckenna · **Posted:** Thu Oct 02, 2008 4:45 pm

ive got mines

milk · **Posted:** Thu Oct 02, 2008 9:34 pm

not received any notification myself yet..

michaelbowdidge · **Posted:** Thu Oct 02, 2008 11:39 pm

Got mine - might have a spare, not sure yet...

neil · **Joined:** Mon Jan 22, 2007 5:50 pm **Posts:** 644

Got my tickets. Sweet! See you there...

Mia.S. · **Joined:** Wed Sep 24, 2008 1:52 am **Posts:** 9

chris wrote:

yes please, my request for tickets was rejected! have they no taste!

outraged!

Mine too. Not impressed.

Jimmy Bastard · **Posted:** Mon Oct 06, 2008 1:20 pm

All my spares have been passed on.
Anyone else have any going?

Gandhi · **Posted:** Mon Oct 06, 2008 1:48 pm

woohoo, got me a ticket, see you's there

katherineer · **Joined:** Thu Oct 02, 2008 3:53 pm **Posts:** 1

Hi guys,

Doing the final guestlist tomorrow for Edinburgh. If we rejected you, I'm sorry!!! Email me directly (address above) and I'll see what I can do.

Also, for all the shows so far there have been quite a few no shows on the night. I think since it's a free show people don't think to cancel. Felix is keen on getting as many people in as possible. So as long as you get there around 7:00pm I'm pretty sure you'll be able to get in.

Hope you guys enjoy the show!

Katherine

simone · **Joined:** Wed Mar 19, 2008 11:47 am **Posts:** 579

can't wait
so shall we meet at forest first? i have no idea where jongleurs is...

Jimmy Bastard · **Posted:** Tue Oct 07, 2008 9:12 pm

Jongleurs is in the Omni centre partway down Leith Walk,
so we should be looking to leave half-six,
I'll be at Forest from six.

simone · **Joined:** Wed Mar 19, 2008 11:47 am **Posts:** 579

lovely see you then

Mia.S. · **Joined:** Wed Sep 24, 2008 1:52 am **Posts:** 9

Yay, I have tickets.

stephengoodall · **Joined:** Thu Jun 28, 2007 6:29 pm **Posts:** 790

Lisa and I are also attending, but will see you down there.

simone · **Joined:** Wed Mar 19, 2008 11:47 am **Posts:** 579

oh what a night!
cheers guys
i have had this poem going round and round in my head since
cheers mr dennis

Please Mrs Butler

Please Mrs Butler
This boy Derek Drew
Keeps copying my work, Miss.
What shall I do?

Go and sit in the hall, dear.
Go and sit in the sink.
Take your books on the roof, my lamb.
Do whatever you think.

Please Mrs Butler
This boy Derek Drew
Keeps taking my rubber, Miss.
What shall I do?

Keep it in your hand, dear.
Hide it up your vest.
Swallow it if you like, love.
Do what you think best.

Please Mrs Butler
This boy Derek Drew
Keeps calling me rude names, Miss.
What shall I do?

Lock yourself in the cupboard, dear.
Run away to sea.
Do whatever you can, my flower.
But don't ask me!

Allan Ahlberg

Forest BB

V. IMPORTANT: DID I MENTION THE FREE WINE?

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